just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
