i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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