id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
