Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
