I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
