I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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