Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
