I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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