I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
