She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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