i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Congratulations! We have a period
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
