I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
