I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
