Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
We need to get me chipped asap
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
