she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
we're making bets on your personal life
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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