gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
