sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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