he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Randomize
