so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
