after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
