so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
