I need help removing her.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize