I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
