Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I'm too high and old for this...
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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