My first STD was from a foam party
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize