they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
