none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
