he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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