She went from zero to smokin in five shots
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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