I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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