theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
