it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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