i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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