we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize