I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
