i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
