Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
