margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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