Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
