Me too!
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
