please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
