1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
