either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
This house was built for laser tag.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
