She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
