omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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