Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Randomize
