i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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