girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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