So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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