so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I deserve this hangover.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
