Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
